Mid-Life Crisis…Already?…

Can you have a mid-life crisis in your early thirties?

I recently asked this question to one of my friends, and they insisted that it is normal.   I have recently been feeling as though I am walking a tightrope and I am about to lose my balance and fall.  Have you ever felt this way?  I most certainly cannot be the only one. Right?…(Buler….Buler…)

Given this frustrating and stressful time, I have decided to do some self-reflecting to understand myself better to help things fall into place. I am still working on my “self-discovery,” but I have already learned some things that I thought have thought to be helpful and empowering.

Goals

I recently started an online course based on productivity by Ruth Soukup.  This course is written primarily for bloggers but has such great information in it for anyone who is looking to set goals.   Ruth’s course will have you dream big and then break those goals down to into bit size goals that make it easier for you to keep working towards those amazing, “big” goals.

You can bet I made some absolute crazy goals, but I thought why not?  Making these huge goals and dreams are part of the “assignment” and I am actually looking forward to the challenge!

What I Learned About Setting Goals

  • When setting goals, start by dreaming big.  Write the goals down no matter how big or silly they may seem! For this example, I will use a common goal of being the healthiest version of myself.
  • Break those goals down into smaller goals and set a “due date”
    • One of my “bite-size” goals is to be drinking more water every day.  I plan to make this a habit within the next three months and have even set a reminder on my phone(I like checking things off lists).
    • My next “bite-sized” goal is to be working out consistently by month six.  I am still struggling with this one some!
    • The last “bite-sized” goal is to not have “overindulgences” three times a week.  I really like to eat, so I partake in over-indulging a lot.  I am giving myself nine months to this goal.
  • After the goals are set, I check in and see how I am doing on my goals frequently.  The hope is that I will make these goal habits so they become more natural!  It does not require as much “work” to do something that is already natural.

If you would like to read some books on goal setting, and turning goals into habits, these are some excellent books (click on the books for additional info)




I am going to say it…Work Out or Do Yoga

I know it is such a chore to work out, especially when you have children.  There are ways to make it easier, trust me.  First of all, you will need to make time…I know, who has time?!  Making time may involve getting up earlier or getting your kids involved to get that work out it(exercise is good for everyone!). I know it is tough getting up earlier but if it is the only time that you have time, try to make a goal of it.  Remove the roadblocks that will just make excuses easy, maybe sleep in your work out clothes or make sure you have to get out of bed to shut off your alarm.  Second, do not bite off more than you can chew-start with a video or program that you can handle.

I personally LOVE Fitness Blenders.  All of their videos are free, but if you prefer a little hand-holding(like me), their programs are very reasonably priced. You do not need any fancy equipment(hello soup cans) and you can do all the workouts in the comfort of your own home.  (…one less excuse…)

After I have worked out, my mind very clear and I feel so much better.  This allows me to tackle my day more efficiently(why, hello to-do list) and I am almost always in a better mood because of it. Win-Win


Personality Tests

This is a different approach, but it has been the most interesting.  The more I have been learning about my personality type the more insight I have into why I react to things the way I do.  I will warn you that some of the things you will learn about yourself are things you may not want to hear.  But, in order to change things we do not like about ourselves, we first need to acknowledge them.

Lately, these personality tests have helped me the most in the “parenting department.”  My stepdaughter has been going through her own struggles, and our relationship has started to suffer due to our very different personalities. Since I am making an effort to learn about these different personality types, I have started to approach these situations and discussions in a different way.

Lastly, the personality tests have been great since I have learned where my strengths and weaknesses are.  Knowing what those are can help greatly when setting out to combat those goals and dreams.  PS- it is just fun to read through the results and say, yeah…that is TOTALLY me.

My two favorite so far have been: Gretchen Rubin’s The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles That Reveal How to Make Your Life Better (and Other People’s Lives Better, Too) and Ian Cron’s The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery

For those wanting to know, I am an Obliger and a #1

Gretchen also has a Happy App that you can check out here.

The Most Unexpected Podcast

I have really taken a liking to Podcasts lately!!!  Podcasts have been great because it allows me to listen to messages of what others have used to feel empowered.  This may come from things as “easy” as changing routines to taking time for yourself.   Frequently guests on the shows are trying to sell something and have a lot of information to share.  I typically do not buy the things that are being sold, and I feel most of them are good about not rubbing it in your face. Although, their messages make me feel energized and give me hope when I am looking for direction

I have really found that Podcasts are still pushing me towards my goals, which is exciting!

My journey to “self-discovery” is just starting, but I am very excited about the road I am starting on.

Have you ever been ready to hit the reset button?  If so, what did you do to get it under control?

~Jessi

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